Summary – Arya murders some dudes, Tyrion has a shitty day, Bran meets Sam in a yawn inducing scene, Jaime makes it home, Jon experiences the pain of a break up, Varys bribes a whore, Roose and Walder Frey share a scene, Dany is a mother kinda, Ramsay talks a lot about dicks Quote Tywin: […]
Oh Boy Summary – Robb and Cat go to a wedding and… you know what? I’m too depressed for a summary. Let’s get on to the quote instead. Quote: Roose Bolton- “The Lannisters send their regards.” A cowardly act from such a cowardly, bald man. Bolton makes sure that Robb knows exactly why this happened as […]
Summary: Arya tries for a murder, Dany chats with three potential suitors, one suitor is a head above the rest, Tyrion and Sansa get married, Joffrey nearly loses his dick, Gendry’s penis is drained, Theon is pissed at all the penis references in the intro, Davos is out on bail. Quote: Davos Seaworth: I […]
Summary: Jon figures everyone is going to die, Ygritte doesn’t care, Orell is a meddling twot, Robb is stuck in the rain, Jaime helps Brienne fight a bear, love isn’t long lasting, Sansa is depressed, Tywin is the best heel on the show, Dany threatens another world leader, Osha is a giant hypocrite. Quote: Barristan […]
Summary – Jon and Ygritte have a climb, Melisandra wants a young man’s body, Tywin and Olenna have a chat, Varys and Littlefinger has a chat, Bran watched a seizure happen and does nothing, Tyrion and Sansa are screwed, Ros is a coat rack, Theon is somehow in worse shape. Quote: Littlefinger – Chaos isn’t a […]
Summary – The Hound fights for his life, Beric takes a bloody nap, Arya loses more people she cares about, Jon makes the sex, Jaime opens up, Qyburn lights a stump on fire, Sansa has hope, Tyrion is talked down to a lot, Grey Worm appears, Barristan and Jorah measure their uhh swords, Stannis is […]
Summary – Jaime needs a helping hand, the Hound fights for his life, Cersei has a bad day, Joffrey is a scary little boy, Sansa gets hope for about three seconds, Varys is all over the place in this episode, Theon makes a personal 360, Jeor comes down with a severe case of death, Jon misses the […]
Summary: Blackfish is a baller, Edmure is not a shot caller, Jon is sent to help scout the Night’s Watch, Sam has a pity party, Podrick comes up big, Tyrion gets another crappy job, Dany makes a bad trade like a Mets GM, Jaime loses about 5 pounds. Quote: Ser Jorah Mormont: “Rhaegar fouhgt […]
Summary – Jon and Mance have a lovely 5 second chat, Jaime and Brienne have their first fight, Robb gets no respect, Catelyn continues to be a bad mother, Bran gets screen time, Arya meets the Brotherhood without Banners. Quotes: Mance Rayder: Do you know what it takes to unite ninety clans, half […]
Summary: The Night’s Watch has a tough battle against ice. Jon meets the king beyond the wall. Dany meets a charming man, and then an old knight. Tyrion fears for his life. Tywin wins father of the year. Davos makes a difficult journey only to be jailed. Margarey plays chess while Joffrey doesn’t understand checkers. […]
