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The George RR Martin Problem or A Song of Procrastination and… Ehh I’ll Finish the Title Later

The George RR Martin Problem or A Song of Procrastination and… Ehh I’ll Finish the Title Later

Everyday Life Rants
Bayonne, New Jersey isn’t known for much historical relevance. In fact, there’s really only a few things the city is famous for. Back in the 1800s, Bayonne was a popular vacation destination, where the crème de la crème stayed. Of course, this was before the Hudson had 3 eyed fish, toxic waste, and a distinct odor of manic depression. Needless to say,  the only people staying in Bayonne today for long weekends are visiting family, or trying to avoid being caught. Another proud distinction is Bayonne is often referenced by the classic program, the Honeymooners. The Honeymooners made Bayonne to seem like a shady, awful place to live. That description is completely… Let’s change the subject shall we? In the most recent years, Bayonne had an unlikely celebrity – one…
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Disney is Killing the Ducktales Revival Or The Quack is Back! Then it’s Not…Then it is… Then Not… Then Maybe?

Disney is Killing the Ducktales Revival Or The Quack is Back! Then it’s Not…Then it is… Then Not… Then Maybe?

Entertainmnet Rants
Although it seems cartoons run forever, they usually only have 2-3 years where new episodes are created. The run of a show like Spongebob, which has been around for 20 years, or even an adult cartoon, like the Simpsons* are the exceptions to the rule. The reason cartoons feel like they run forever is because they’re replayed consistently. Try spending a week watching Nickelodeon, or have a glance at the TV guide, and you’ll see a scary amount of episodes for particular shows, and an even scarier amount of the same episode being shown. TV networks used to love loading up on a new cartoon early. In the first season or two, networks would prepare upwards of 65 episodes if the first 10 episodes were pulling in viewers. Then, they…
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Andrew Luck is Overrated or I’m Breaking the Hearts of Pawnee’s Citizens

Andrew Luck is Overrated or I’m Breaking the Hearts of Pawnee’s Citizens

Sports Rants
[caption id="attachment_106" align="alignnone" width="300"] Everybody is a critic[/caption] Just a season ago, the NFL was experiencing a quarterback renaissance. There were the old guard who did not appear to be slowing down. The new era QBs all made strides to entrench themselves as franchise saviors. A few quarterbacks burst on the scene, raising expectations for themselves and their teams. It looks as though more than half the NFL rosters had a long-term solution at the position. It addition many others franchises had promising prospects who could make the leap. The Jets and Browns were nowhere near this discussion. Fast forward to the week of the AFC and NFC championship games and you would think you were following a different league. The Quarterback play league wide took a significant spike downward.…
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Peppa Pig – Male Hating Propaganda or Feminists, Please Send Your Hate Mail to…

Peppa Pig – Male Hating Propaganda or Feminists, Please Send Your Hate Mail to…

Entertainmnet Rants
Kid’s shows tend to be some of the weirdest programs on TV. Now, I’m not talking about cartoons in general. Some cartoons are designed to be weird for the sake of being weird, and are targeted at older children. I’m referring to shows for the preschoolers; the type that should be educating the youth on their letters, their colors, and how to be a decent human being. Somehow, these are the shows that twist their moral obligation, and create some of the most bizarre characters out there. For every Paw Patrol or Dora the Explorer, there’s a bunch of “unique” programs that are written during a cocaine binge in a dimly lit studio apartment. Remember Teletubbies? Assuming you’re not 14 or Amish (maybe both?), you definitely do. The Teletubbies were…
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The Sad, Cruel End to Harry Potter Weekend or Hey Freeform, Need About 40 Scripts?

The Sad, Cruel End to Harry Potter Weekend or Hey Freeform, Need About 40 Scripts?

Entertainmnet Rants
At the age of 30, I finished Harry Potter. It was honestly only about a month ago. I’m not sure if I should be proud of this fact, or embarrassed. Like most kids, I started reading the series when it came out. I read through the first 4 books, and was gifted the 5th book on its release day. I started to read it, enjoyed it, and then never picked it up again. I couldn’t tell you why, but I didn’t. Finally, this year, I decided to finish what I started. Of course, I had no recollection about the series other than Harry’s aunt and uncle were assholes and that Harry was a wizard. I knew that Hagrid was a huge giant of the man (Spoilers!), and most men who…
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The Curious Case of Andy Reid or This article is not Sponsored by Rolex

The Curious Case of Andy Reid or This article is not Sponsored by Rolex

Sports Rants
[caption id="attachment_64" align="alignnone" width="300"] Is he though? Is he?-[/caption] One of the most infuriating movie tropes involves the villain giving away his scheme to the hero instead of just killing him. It’s rare for an action movie not show the hero captured by his nemesis. The villain, celebrating his genius, puts the hero in some sort of elaborate, convoluted death trap. Then, when it’s all but assured the villain will win, he takes 20 minutes to explain every detail of his plan, offer blueprints to his secret base, and lists weakness of all his henchmen. Then, to be the surprise of only the villain, the hero escapes at the last second, thwarts the evil plans, and gets some heroine booty. You know what have been a more effective use of…
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Baby It’s Cold Outside – Hollywood’s Confessional or Here’s a Fizzy Drink, It’s Fine

Entertainmnet Rants
As the holidays have just ended, I think now is a great time to reflect on what the season was all about. You may have your own thoughts on the holiday season, but for me, the time of year is dominated by the four following aspects.   1). Holiday decor – Who doesn’t like walking through the streets during the holiday season and seeing decorations? Sure, some houses are nicer than others, but most put forth a good effort. This, of course, excludes the houses who celebrate Christmas but don’t put up as much as a wreath. It’s good practice to note which houses don’t decorate and target them of mischief night next year. A few well-placed eggs can make anyone feel the holiday spirit soon after. Of course, sometimes…
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Opening Post or The Backstory of Bloggin Hood

Everyday Life Rants
Most of my childhood revolved around basketball and writing stories. When I wasn’t doing one, I was busy with the other. While the basketball was relatively competent for a 5-year-old, the stories were not. My first attempts writing involved people eating bars of soap, poorly drawn stick figures and a main character whose name was Fat Head. That was not a nickname, but a God-given name on a birth certificate. This was not Shakespeare, but boy did it make me laugh. I would write these things for hours, filling up marble notebook after marble notebook. Nowadays, I can’t sign my name without feeling carpel tunnel. Thanks for that, past me. Jerk. Middle school provided a few opportunities to write creatively, but mostly by teachers who had no clue how to…
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