Predicting the NBA All Star Draft Order or Step Right Up and Take a Pot Shot at LeBron

January 29, 2018 By Bloggin Hood

Loyal readers (reader?), I have failed you. It gives me no joy to admit this, but I dropped the ball. It is my duty, nay, my honor to provide the most ridiculous topics to rant and complain about. I’m both humbled and saddened by this, but will present you the best blog I can on the topic, despite being nearly a week late.

The NBA changed up their All Star game format. I don’t know how this slipped through the cracks, but it did. When I heard that there would a draft to decide the All Star game rosters, I became giddy. This was amazing news. It was the first fascinating idea the NBA had since David Stern began fixing the lottery system to favor the big markets.

Drafts, by definition, are one of the top parts of sports. You know how excited everyone is on the day your fantasy league drafts? All the GMs are full of hope for the new season. After the draft, you begin studying your roster, confident you’ll bring home the trophy/championship belt. Flash forward two months later, and your team is 1-7, devastated by injuries, or picking Terrelle Pryor and you sweat you’ll never play again.

Remember, the draft is still enjoyable or mater how abysmal the rest of the season goes. This All Star draft would be no different. Nobody cares about the game itself – it’s a dunk fest that used to be cool, but we all have Youtube access now. Nobody plays hard in these games because it means nothing. The last thing athletes want to do is get hurt in an exhibition. Despite this, I’m confident people would be all in on the All Star draft.

The possibilities were endless. Think of the amount of pettiness and bad blood that the process could cause. For starters, where would the draft take place? Would all the players be in a single room, causing tensions to rise when they weren’t picked? Could players not get selected at all? How many picks would pass before DeMarcus Cousins began a fist fight with another player? God, this was going to be amazing.

Unfortunately, things were not exactly what the seemed. The format did involve a draft, but it wasn’t as free-flowing as I hoped. As per tradition, the fans voted for the starters. The top vote getters from each conference would serve as team captain. After the starters were finalized, the remaining players would be selected, as voted on by the media. These reserves would be two guards, three forwards and two remaining spots that could be filled by any position. Sadly, these spots were still divided up by conferences, so there would be twelve players from each.

If you’re going to draft players, regardless of conference, what purpose does having twelve from each serve? We should be taking the best players available, especially after the fans screw up and vote for Kobe. Instead, even while trying something fresh, the league stuck to their old traditions.

However, the fans really didn’t mess things up for once, and voted in a decent 10 players. Sure, they all shouldn’t have started, but the 10 players would have made the roster outright. As a person who is against fan voting for nearly anything, I tip my cap to you. I’m not wearing a cap, but take the compliment anyway.

The leading vote getters were LeBron James and Stephen Curry. Good thing we haven’t seen these two face off against each other yet.

The draft format is also an issue. The leading vote getter, LeBron, receives the first pick, where he can only choose from the pool of starters. Curry would pick next, then LeBron, then Curry ect, until all 10 starters are selected. Afterwards, the reserves are drafted, with Curry having the first pick this time. Why couldn’t players pick from the full pool of talent? I get the starters were chosen by the fans to start, but maybe they should have voted on 10 players to make the game. This is a huge disadvantage if a top-tier player was snubbed.

This is also dumb because the draft isn’t snake style. Since the fan vote was fairly appropriate (for once), LeBron gets first choice on the most talented players, while Curry gets first pick for the subs. Figures that LeBron gets the best picks. I’m sure he whined about this like he whined about Draymond missing a kick when the Warriors were about to win back to back titles. Funny he got the advantageous situations in both scenarios.

While I understand the All Star game is based on this year, I do wish all players would have been eligible.  Chris Paul and Kawhi Leonard would have been early picks. A healthy Leonard has a reasonable claim as the #1 pick*. Due to their injuries, they shouldn’t be in the 2018 All Star game. There are players who are having great years who deserve the nod. But man, I can’t wait to see the bad blood Leonard and Paul will add to the mix next season. You know Lebron would have taken Kawhi over Durant. You know it. Plus, Curry wouldn’t pick Paul because Paul is a jerk and cheap shots Curry if every game they play.

I’m just calling it like it is America.

Even with the flaws, I was still pumped. There was just one small issue. The draft wasn’t televised.

You know how people want to see the Media’s votes on awards be released to the public? Usually this is to reveal someone’s terrible ballot to the public and humiliate the person.. We should have it revealed who agreed to let this draft be behind closed doors. Then, we should tar and feather them. A good tar and feathering usually fixes things.

How in the world did was this not televised? The only enjoyable part of All Star weekend is the celebrity game, mostly to laugh at how poor the celebrities are and how the commentators rip on the awful play. Now, we could have added a new positive element to the weekend. I’ll be honest, the draft order would have given me incentive to watch the game. Now, I have absolutely none. Shouldn’t the goal be to create buzz for the event? While this decision is getting people talking, it’s not for the right reasons. It’s people like me saying the concept was executed poorly.

Think of the plot lines the draft would have covered. Would LeBron take any Warriors or Kyrie? Would LeBron beg Steph to take Kevin Love off his hands, even for only one game? Who would be the second player off the board after Durant? How many players have issues with each other, affecting the rosters on both side? All these great mysteries, created from the pettiest drama snatched away from us. Stupid NBA. This could have caused more drama than the whether or not Kylie Jenner is pregnant. I think the ratings for this even could have been big.

Alas, we’re stuck only guessing what happened. Wouldn’t it be fun to try and figure out what the draft order was?

I’ve reached out to Lil’ Jon, member of the merry men for his thoughts on the draft.

Lil’ Jon – Photoed as of 2002 (Age 13)

Originally, I had wanted to do a mock draft, filled with LeBron’s passive aggressiveness, but since the rosters were set, the mock would have been pointless. Instead we used the rosters and tried to piece together which picks occurred when. The draft had a surprising amount of strategy, but a huge amount of not at all surprising favoritism. Here are the completed rosters, listed in alphabetical order.

List Courtesy of ESPN. I give credit when it is due

 

I won’t lie that both of us like Curry more than LeBron. We agree LeBron is the best player in the game, but we cannot stand his personality. I’m not saying the picks will include some shots at LeBron. I’m saying there will be a lot of shots at LeBron. I figured it was fair warning, but I’m pretty happy with the analysis and the order we came up with. I think we nailed it.

Without further ado, LeBron is on the clock.

 

Team LeBron – Kevin Durant

With the first pick in the draft, LeBron takes Durant who is the 2nd best player in the league. Truly, he had to be the pick. Now, the cynical side of me thinks this is Lebron trying to avoid going head to head with his main rival. The head to head match up would have brought some spice to the game, adns erved as a potential passing of the torch moment. There’s also the camp who think LeBron should have avoided all Warriors on his roster, which I understand. At the same time, you can’t criticize LeBron for taking the best player available. And trust me, I want to.

Team Curry – Giannis Antetokounmpo

I will never, ever write out the Greek Freak’s full name again. You can take that to the bank, readers.

While I think he’s still a little lower on the totem than Harden and Davis, the Greek Freak is young and hungry. That’s key for an All Star game. Giannis wants to prove himself in his breakout year, and could be gunning for the All Star MVP trophy. Curry will need size, and Giannis is a good complement to what Curry ultimately did with his squad – his lack of shooting won’t matter as everybody else has range to spare.

Team LeBron – Anthony Davis

A clear augment could be made for Harden, but Davis was the best big man available. LeBron wants the ball in his hand, and taking Harden would have reduced that. Davis provides elite production in every facet of the game. There’s not much analytics needed – Davis is just really good.

Team Curry – James Harden

After Harden, there is a tier drop off in the starters pool. Harden is playing at an MVP level. There’s a case he was taken  two spots too low. He is ball dominant, but Curry can play off the ball and square up. In many ways, this could be a perfect fit.

And hey, it’s an All Star game. There’s going to be a lot of running, gunning and no defense. Harden fits the mold perfectly.

Team LeBron – DeMarcus Cousins

LeBron needed to have Cousins beyond just taking the best big available. This pick will serve as a showcase to the Cavs that they should trade the Nets pick for Cousins and try to win another title. While an All Star game isn’t exactly the best place to showcase in-game chemistry, LeBron would feature Cousins, probably run a bunch of pick and roles with him and try to convince the organization it would be a great fit. It’s going to be tough for player LeBron to convince GM LeBron and Front Office LeBron to pull the trigger on this deal.

I wouldn’t get too comfortable over there Kevin Love.**

Team Curry – DeMar Derozan

-There’s nothing wrong with DeMar Derozan, who’s having the best season of his career. However, Curry took Derozan for two reasons.

1). The rules state that all the starters must be picked first, so Russell Westbrook couldn’t be on his team. I think if all players were available, Westbrook is picked here.

2). This forces LeBron to take Kyrie, who he does not want to draft. This is hilarious. Curry set up his draft to force LeBron to pick Kyrie. If the draft really unfolded this way, my respect for Curry increased ten fold. Curry for Space Jam 2!***

Team LeBron – Kyrie Irving

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Ok, I got it out of my system. LeBron really didn’t have a choice here. Kyrie is the best fit for his team, and he did all he could to not draft him. Basically, LeBron got stuck with Kyrie like a team gets stuck with an un-athletic kid in a pick up game because he brought the only ball available. Again, my respect for Curry has only risen.

Now, you can argue Lebron got a good player at a discounted draft price. Kyrie’s play-style is ideal for the All Star game. However, this isn’t about the game. This is about the personal animosity the two have. I hope both try to freeze each other out all game. Will LeBron force Kyrie to ride the bench after the first three minutes of the game. The possibilities for the pettiness are endless.

Could LeBron pretend that he picked Kyrie to help end their fued? That would be incredibly tone-deaf and passive aggressive, so I expect a LeBron press conference confirming this on the Saturday before the All Star game.

Team Curry – Joel Embiid

Embiid was the last available starter, so Curry was assigned him. However, Embiid is young and hungry so I think this could pay dividends for team Curry. Embiid could put up a 20-20 in like 18 minutes of play, and then tweet out more shade to Rihanna.

Team Curry – Draymond Green

This was not a misprint. Now that we moved into the reserves, Curry gets a second consecutive pick. Don’t blame the author, blame the NBA. If they televised the damn thing, we wouldn’t have this issue.

I think Steph would start picking his teammates, and he’d start with Draymond. Green is the heart and soul of the Warriors, the league’s best talker, and he hates LeBron with all his being. I’m not sure if LeBron is aware how much Draymond hates him, but you can feel it in each Warriors vs Cavs game. Even in an All Star game, Draymond will take the challenge and try to shut down LeBron as best he can. All while calling him a bitch repeatedly.

There’s a small part of me that thinks Curry had to take Draymond here not just because of the teammate link. Curry needs to pick Green because he is a scary man. There’s a chance Curry is scared of Draymond, and that would be justified. Dude’s crazy. I would be shocked if anyone else was selected here.

Team LeBron – Russell Westbrook

This one is also straightforward. Westbrook is the best player on the board, and team LeBron needs another guard. Westbrook would have went four picks higher if he could have been selected.

I don’t think LeBron minds pairing Durant and Westbrook. Anything that might throw the two of them off their game for the second half of the season would be a bonus. LeBron had to take Westbrook here based on talent, but the extra side effects don’t hurt. LeBron is such a jerk.

Team Curry – Klay Thompson

Curry makes another obvious choice in taking the last Warrior. I don’t think Klay would care that he was picked after Draymond (He’s probably scared of the guy too). This allows the Splash Brothers to play together in the All Star game, and likely put on a show. This is the first of several picks Steph makes to build his team around heat check players. His team has four or five guys who could go for 20+ points in a quarter.

Team LeBron – Kevin Love

Realizing that maybe he too should take his teammates, LeBron takes Kevin Love. Now, this was a round later than it should have been, but at least he did it.

In my first draft, I had Love as the last pick as LeBron begged Curry to take Love off his hands. Curry smartly did not, much like the Kyrie scenario. However, Lil’ Jon convinced me he would draft him here and I conceded. That’s a little Bloggin Hood inside baseball for you.

Team Curry – Jimmy Butler

Butler was the obvious choice for several reason, but mainly because he was the clear-cut best player available. He’s also good defender, and he’ll be happy to harass LeBron. Not much to say here – Butler was a no brainer pick.

Team LeBron – Kristaps Porzingas

It’s no secret at this point in the draft, Team Curry is a little weak in the front court. It’s a smart strategy to go with a big here. LeBron goes with Porzingas who seems to be a player all the players love. I think he’s good, and a deserving All-Star, but he’s a tad bit overrated. Still, he’s a Seven footer who can shoot and protect the rim. That’ll play.

Team Curry – Karl-Anthony Towns

Steph really had no choice but to take Towns here, as LeBron could have drafted him next round. This team needed an athletic big to run the floor, crucial in an exhibition game. If Towns isn’t selected here, Curry would have been stuck with Horford and Aldrich, two talented bigs, but ones who aren’t filling a lane on a fast break. This was a need pick.

Team LeBron – John Wall

Biggest named point guard left, though not necessarily the best one for the all-star format. He is a distributor at heart which works.

Needing another Point Guard, LeBron turns to John Wall. Wall is the biggest Point Guard left in the draft, and while some of his skill transfer very well for the format (passing, speed, transition game) others do not (shooting mostly). It’s not the worst pick, but I actually liked the other two point guards better for an All Star game.

Team Curry – Damian Lillard

In an All Star game, you don’t need the most complete roster. You need to score at a feverish pace. Lillard wouldn’t have been the ideal fit for a season long roster, but for an All Star game, he’s perfect. Lillard is a heat check player, just like Curry, and fits his roster build. Team Curry is going to try to drain an abundance of threes and win that way. Lillard would fit right in.

Team LeBron – Bradley Beal

At this point LeBron s in need of shooting. He has to take Beal here, even though Kyle Lowry is the better overall player. Beal’s shooting touch will add an element to Team LeBron, but it’s a need fit more than the best player available.

Team Curry – Kyle Lowry

Curry doubled down with this pick, drafting another heat check guy. Now, Curry’s team has a clear edge on shooting.

Is there any chance that LeBron didn’t want to draft any Raptors? They are shaping up to be their biggest obstacle to losing to the Warriors in the finals. I don’t think so. LeBron would probably seek out his rivals to join him…

Too soon?

Team LeBron – LaMarcus Aldridge

Similar to Curry, LeBron wisely doubles down on his team’s strength, size and boards by grabbing Aldridge. I’m not sure who’s the better player between Aldridge and Horford, but either way, they are similar. I think Horford is more of a glue guy while Aldridge is closer to the textbook definition of a star.

Team Curry – Al Horford

Team Curry needed to take the remaining big. I’m sure he was tempted to go all in with Oladipo, but Harford was the correct choice. He’s a good Power Forawrd/Center who provides a nice all-around game and it gives depth to the front court.

Team LeBron – Victor Oladipo

Yes he was the last pick, but there’s no shame in that. Somebody had to be the last pick, but that would make him the 24th best player this season. Oladipo deserved to be on the All Star team and I hope he has a monster game.

Of course, this draft took place before DeMarcus Cousins’ season ending injury. I didn’t want to change anything as the draft logic was set with the original roster. Cousins has been replaced by Paul George who will help open things up for LeBron a little more. He’ll provide another player to run in transition, and when the game gets serious, he’ll actually play defense. What a concept! So much for that Cousins trade LeBron. Ah well, at least you’ll watch somebody else get crushed by the Warriors in the finals for once.

Overall, I think the teams are interesting, but on paper, I do have to give an advantage to Team LeBron. The fun part is the All Star game is all about getting hot and putting on a show, which Team Curry will be able to do. Also, let’s remember it’s a game for entertainment only. It doesn’t even count. Nobody should be taking this seriously.

And that’s the biggest problem. All the league had to do was televised this draft, which wouldn’t have taken more than an hour. If players’ egos are that fragile, remind them they make millions of dollars annually for playing a game. We as fans have the right to know the order. The personal relationships, rivalries and bad blood were the only things that could save the All Star game. How can the NBA not take advantage of bringing reality to their product. Instead, we’ll watch a game that won’t have any defense for the first 45 minutes.

I’m glad that we can piece together this draft. If the actually order is revealed, I’ll be curious to see how accurate we were. I’d like to give a special thank you to Lil’ Jon for helping plot out the draft and for shooting down my dumber ideas for this column (there was a lot).

*I wouldn’t place him quite that high, but I understand it.

**Well, now you can.

***Curry would not be my first pick for Space Jam 2, but that’s a different blog… coming soon.